Recovering from the effects of child sexual abuse takes a lifetime. There is no being cured of it. But, thankfully, life does regain the sweetness and lightness that was lost when, over time, you learn to stop blaming yourself for what happened.
I was able to bury the abuse for 20 years before I began to recall it. Then, after seeing there might be a connection between the wreckage of my life and events that derailed me in high school, I began learning how to show up for life, on life’s terms. After only 25 more years I was ready to give the shame back to its rightful owners. I sent a letter to my school, detailing as best I could, everything that happened to me that year. The world got much lighter after that….
Pope Francis did an amazing thing, for a pope, that is. He declared that the “culture of abuse and cover-up”, as it pertains to the sexual abuse of children by the Catholic Church, must end. The statement was made in a letter to the Catholics of Chile, where a sex abuse scandal has been on display for the whole world to see unfold.
The same disparity that enables exploitations like this to occur also keeps them from getting exposed. This is how it has always been. Except now the balance of power has shifted. There is strength in numbers and courage inspires yet more courage. The flood is far from over and hopefully will continue until a true shift in society’s passive acceptance of this kind of behavior is finally burned away.
That might as well be what the Republicans have been saying for all the years they’ve blocked the Child Victims Act (“CVA”). Relying on a set of talking points (given them by lobbyists) they stall for time. By acknowledging that justice for survivors is an important issue they are studying, they try to placate activists. Then they qualify it by saying it is a more complicated issue than we imagine. Yet, they assure us, they are actively discussing it in conference and will come up with a solution that is fair to everyone, given enough time to do their job.
As I was listening to the teenagers who so eloquently and passionately spoke at the March For Our Lives today, I realized there are a host of similarities between the efforts to reform gun laws and those to reform statutes of limitation for child sex abuse, especially now that the students of Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, who survived the mass shooting last month have elevated the issue in the consciousness of Americans voters….